


How to Find a Family When You Have None

by PlatonicRabbit



Series: Soulmate AU [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Car Accidents, Disabled Character, F/M, Hospitals, M/M, Minor Character Death, Parental neglect/ abandonment, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-11
Updated: 2015-04-11
Packaged: 2018-03-21 21:37:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3705471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlatonicRabbit/pseuds/PlatonicRabbit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel couldn't remember how old he’d been when the first letter appeared. He had been very young and he had had no one to tell him what it was or what it meant.</p><p>(Can be read independently of part 1)</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to Find a Family When You Have None

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry about the theft warning if you find it off-putting, but there are sites which use bots to steal and re-upload fics from AO3 and profit from them. I'm not taking chances.

**If you're not reading this on AO3 it has been stolen.**

Castiel couldn’t remember how old he had been when the first letter appeared. He had been very young and he'd had no one to tell him what the mark was or what it meant. 

For the longest time, Castiel thought it was just a birthmark, nothing special, except for being shaped like the letter _D_. Then he’d seen the marks on the back of the hands of Ellen and Bill, the nice couple who had inquired about adopting Castiel, and they’d looked like his. He had asked Ellen, the lady with the kind smile, what they meant, and that was the first time Castiel heard the word soulmate. He knew instantly that it was his new favourite word, just like Ellen was going to be his favourite mom; Castiel hadn't quite forgotten his birth mother yet.

The adoption papers were just days from being finalized when Castiel was taken aside by the Director of the Children’s Home and told that they were very sorry, but Bill, the man who had wanted Castiel to be his son, had been in an accident and died. Ellen could no longer afford to adopt a little boy; she was going to struggle to care for just herself and her daughter Jo, and she couldn't be Castiel’s mother anymore.

The Director wasn't unkind about it, and she made sure Castiel knew that it was not his fault Ellen couldn't adopt him, and that she still would if she were able. Castiel cried himself to sleep that night anyway.

He woke up the next morning with another letter, an _e_. Castiel couldn't bring himself to care.

 

Castiel wondered if his soulmate would be interested in an orphan. Probably not, he decided. Especially not a scruffy looking, scrawny orphan like him. Castiel resolved to try harder. Maybe if he wasn't so untidy he would find another family to adopt him.

The young boy soon gained a reputation as the neat freak of the Group Home. He dressed in too many layers, in nice(ish) clothes when he could get them, and tried his best to make himself stand out from the crowd on adoption days. It wasn't the best strategy for surviving in that environment; full of young children with a lot of serious psychological damage and not enough supervision.

After the third time Castiel watched a couple pass him over in favour of a tow-headed toddler covered in dirt he asked the director what was wrong with him.

She put her hand on Castiel’s shoulder and explained that most parents wanted babies, wanted to experience as much of their new child as they could, and it wasn't Castiel’s fault but some of the parents thought they would be getting cheated by taking home an older child. 

Castiel thought that sounded like hogwash. He thought the other children were being adopted because they were cute and giggled and smiled on demand, while Castiel was too serious, unsmiling, and held himself too stiffly.

 

It wasn't until years later, when Castiel had long since given up on being adopted, that the third letter, the _a_ , appeared. Castiel had almost forgotten that he had a soulmate out there, that he had a chance at finding love, and the reminder was startling. He stared at the mark for hours, until he got a crick in his neck from looking over his own shoulder. Castiel mulled over the names that could possibly be forming on his bicep, saying each once of them out loud, feeling the sound of them on his tongue. The young boy fell asleep each night with the unfamiliar names stuck in his throat.

When Castiel was around fifteen his final letter appeared. He stared at the _n_ in the mirror for so long another boy was sent to check on him. Uriel snorted and rolled his eyes when he saw the letter. Uriel didn’t have a soulmate and generally seemed to disapprove of the whole concept.

Castiel walked to school that day in a daze. When he got there, he found Balthazar, his best friend for several years now. Balthazar liked to pretend he was a lot more worldly than he actually was, but he dropped the act and gave an excited squeak when Castiel showed him the mark. 

Castiel frowned at his friend, finally seeing an opportunity to ask the question he’d been wondering for months.

‘Bal, do you have a tattoo?’

The blond boy grinned widely, showing an absurd number of teeth. 

‘Sure I do, Cassie. It’s on my ass. Wanna see?’

Balthazar burst into hysterical laughter, but cut himself off when his voice cracked unexpectedly. Castiel rolled his eyes. Balthazar was _so funny_.

 

Castiel rubbed his upper arm the way he had taken to doing when nervous. He thought of it as taking comfort from his soulmate before he’d even met him. Balthazar called it being a dork.

Balthazar shifted beside Castiel, just as nervous as he was. The pair were straining their ears to hear how the meeting was going but the director’s office was thoroughly soundproofed.

Balthazar started kicking Castiel's chair with the heel of his foot, hard. The shorter boy glanced over at his friend and cleared his throat.

‘Bal, I’m sixteen.’

The lanky blond boy gave Castiel his best “oh really? I wasn't aware” face.

Castiel ignored him and continued.

‘Even if the director will not allow your sister to adopt me, I am legally able, at my age, to choose my own place of residence. If the state will not make Anna my legal guardian, I can have myself emancipated and come to live with you regardless.’

It had taken Balthazar and Anna four long years to convince Castiel they really wanted him to live with them, but now that Castiel was convinced he would really be welcome, he was as eager as either of the Miltons. They all knew it wasn't terribly likely that Anna would be allowed to adopt Castiel, with her being single, 26 and already the sole caregiver of one teenager, but the three of them were determined to fight for it as hard as they could.

But when Anna emerged from the office she had a huge smile on her face and she was holding a sheath of papers. Castiel jumped up; but faltered, unable to ask his question out loud. Anna answered the unspoken query by hugging her new brother/ adopted son, and he hugged her back, not trying to hide his tears. Balthazar tried to act smug and disinterested, as if Castiel’s future had never been in doubt, but Anna reached out one arm to him and the blond boy jumped right in to the hug.

 

It’s two years later that Balthazar is hit by a car and his knee and lower leg are crushed. Fortunately for Castiel’s adopted brother the accident happens literally in the doorway of a hospital; Castiel has begun volunteering to read to sick children in his spare time and Balthazar was picking him up that day. The doctors rush him away immediately and Castiel stands in the lobby helplessly, covered in his brother’s blood for several long minutes until somebody- Castiel is to dazed to really register who he’s speaking to- takes pity on the teenager and offers to call his family.  
Castiel snaps himself out of it and calls Anna himself. She’s there within the hour, so fast she must have magically flown over the peak hour traffic, and immediately engages the nurse at the reception counter in a heated argument, demanding to know when Balthazar will be out of surgery.

Castiel puts his head in his hands and curls up on the hard plastic seats nearby. He tunes the world out until he feels Anna’s arms around his shoulders.

 

Balthazar’s leg is saved, but he needs surgery the Milton family isn't able to pay for. Anna despairs until Balthazar tells her to suck up her pride and call their uncle for help. 

Castiel has never met his adopted uncle Chuck, and some of the stories he’s heard make him doubt he wants to. Anna’s father’s older brother had four sons who he’d abandoned as teenagers so he could run off and live on his own, writing a series of books that, although they were wildly successful, Balthazar tended to sneer at. All Anna had ever said about the man was that her parent’s will had specifically forbade Chuck taking custody of Balthazar, calling him "irresponsible" and "a neglectful father", though the man had given them quite a bit of financial aid over the years.

Chuck surprised them all by showing up in person, his daughter Raphael in tow. Raph, a first year pre-med student, was a surprise to Castiel as Balthazar had told him the Milton cousins were all male, but Castiel didn’t really care at this point. Raph talks Balthazar through the medical side of things in a far gentler way than the local doctors had managed, and it’s her coaxing that gets the prideful teenager into his first physiotherapy session where Anna and Castiel had failed. Raphael tells them they should know better than to wound Balthazar's pride while trying to coax him into something and Castiel has to concede the point.

After the third session, Balthazar bans both Anna and Castiel from the room, saying he can't concentrate with them there. Raph, possibly because she and Balthazar have never been close before, is allowed to stay, and secretly Castiel is a little relieved. He feels utterly helpless in this situation, while Raph seems to effortlessly motivate Balthazar. Chuck never makes appearances after the day of his arrival, preferring to hole himself up in a hotel, drinking and writing, and send Anna more money than they actually need to pay for Balthazar’s treatment whenever a cheque is due. Raph assures her cousins this is typical Chuck behavior.

It's in the waiting room outside Balthazar’s physio that Castiel meets Dean Winchester.

 

Dean is there for his brother too, although he explains that Adam was injured a long time ago and is unlikely to recover at all. He’s 25 and works as a mechanic for his foster father in a garage the next town over.  
He’s the first person to make Castiel laugh since Balthazar’s accident, and Castiel thinks he’s falling for the older man. Castiel wishes he had the courage to just ask Dean about his soulmate, but he needs this hope right now and if it were taken away he doesn’t know what he would do. He takes to rubbing his shoulder in front of Dean until he’s sure the other boy will notice and say something. 

Anna just watches them, silent and exasperated, and every time Dean leaves she tells Castiel to just ask him already.

She never goes as far as actually outing Castiel to Dean, but one day the young mechanic starts to flirt with her in front of Cas and Anna decides enough is enough. She accidentally-on-purpose trips holding a tray of takeaway coffees for the three of them. Dean is drenched and quickly rips his jacket and shirt off, trying to get the hot coffee off his skin. 

Anna shoots a triumphant look at Castiel after a pointed look at Dean’s newly uncovered shoulders and Castiel swallows. He removes his own coat and hands it to Dean, after discreetly making sure the sleeves of his shirt were rolled up slightly to expose his lettering.

Dean froze partway through putting on Castiel’s trench coat, his eyes caught on the younger boy’s arm. His hand shoots out and grabs Castiel’s wrist, pulling him closer.

‘Cas, why didn’t you say something?’ he asks, his voice hoarse.

‘Why didn’t you?’ Castiel shoots back.

Dean doesn’t seem to have a good answer. 

The door of the physiotherapist’s office opens then, and Balthazar emerges, still leaning heavily on his walking stick but able to carry his own wait. Raphael doesn’t think he’ll need much more therapy at the rate he’s recovering, though Castiel is suspicious of the fact that neither of them seem to want to say what Balthazar’s actual doctors have been telling them. But that’s none of Castiel’s business if Balthazar doesn’t want it to be, so he tries to take his brother’s word for it.

Balthazar leans against the wall so that he can use both hands to applaud and Raphael just rolls her eyes.

‘At least you two aren't as dumb as Samael,’ she mutters.

Dean’s head snaps around and he opens his mouth to say something in response to Raphael’s muttered comment but at that moment Anna pushes Castiel forward until he falls on Dean and the older boy forgets whatever he was about to say. 

Castiel wonders whether Dean is going to kiss him, but he guesses staring contests are nice too.

‘They’re not just going to do that for the rest of eternity, are they?’ Balthazar groans.

‘If they do I might have to take back my earlier comment.’ Raphael rolls her eyes in their direction. 

 

Balthazar ends up having to walk with a cane, but he seems to enjoy it and is constantly twirling it around and dancing with it (as much as he can with his bad knee) and occasionally rapping Castiel and Dean over the head when he catches them staring at each other. For some reason, he never once hits the couple when he catches them making out.

‘You’re actually together; there’s no reason for all this mournful gazing at each other when you could be making out, Cassie.’ Balthazar says when Castiel complains about the bruise on the back of his head.

Chuck seems to have taken up residence in a house a few streets away, something to do with the cheap liquor store next door and local cops liking him better here. Raphael; however, had returned home as soon as Balthazar was out of therapy. She seemed to still be in contact with Balthazar and Anna, though, and Castiel was glad his family was expanding, even if it was a result of the disaster earlier that year.

‘Balthazar, I never thanked you, you know.’

The taller boy gives a long-suffering, dramatic sigh and turns around, leaning back on the kitchen bench.

‘If you had not been run over that day, I would not have met Dean; and Chuck and Raphael would still be strangers to us. Neither would we know Bobby or Adam. I realize your leg still pains you, but in some ways I can’t help but be glad of it.’

‘Tactful as always, Cassie,’ but Balthazar is smiling at Castiel as he says it.

Castiel never thought he would get to have this; a brother and a sister, cousins, close family friends and a soulmate he loves with all his heart. Every night, he prays in thanks for everything he has gained, and though Balthazar and Dean scoff at the practice, Castiel just smiles serenely and prays neither of them ever has to find out what it's like to have no one to love them for so long.

He's not lonely anymore.

 **If you're not reading this on AO3 it has been stolen.**

**Author's Note:**

> The other part of this is Samifer, as a warning to anyone looking for Sabriel (I found Gabriel impossible to write when I first started and Lucifer not so much, and the first part of the story flowed a LOT better that way anyhow.)
> 
> I'm going to get started on the Adam one-shot. Promise. Just don't want to mess it up. I might do a Raphael one-shot in this 'verse as well if anyone's interested? And, well, anything else you guys want just ask, I love writing soulmate AU.


End file.
